Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Check Yourself Before You Wreck Yourself...

The experience I am about to relay actually took place five days ago...but it took me this long to process all of it to share with you. Well, that and to get my eyesight back. I was blind after what I saw last Friday evening.

As I have done in the past, I chaperoned another Middle School dance. I figure it is a great way to be in my daughters' environment and control the situation see what's up in their worlds. Now before I go any further, please know I have never been one of those parents who say, "What, my child? You must be mistaken, my children are angels," because #1) they are children; and #2) I was one of those kids pushing the limits to see how far I could go. Luckily, our daughters are more like their father than their mother and pretty much lay low with their friends without needing to make it all about me waves.

One of the first signs that I was in for a journey to Hell an interesting evening came when I saw some of the clothes these 11, 12, and 13 year old girls were wearing. Or should I say, not wearing. Forget the fact quite a few are ten times more endowed in the bosomal region than I will ever be, the majority of these well-endowed girls were wearing shirts sized for five year olds. There was nothing to the imagination, which is truly sad because someone needs to tell these girls that sexy and sleazy are two entirely different concepts, neither of which girls their age should be entertaining.

Suddenly a song began to play and everyone screamed and got ready to dance. Finally! However, the song was Low by flo rida. Not familiar? Here's a sample of the lyrics:

Hey shawty what I gotta do to get you home
My jeans filled with guap and they're ready for showing
Cadillacs laid back for the sexy grown
Patron on the rocks that'll make you moan
One stack (come on), two stacks (come on), three stacks (come on)
Now that's three grand
What you think I'm playing baby girl I'm the man

It was about to the lyric when he talks about having her legs on his shoulders that I went onto the dance floor to tell a girl to get up off of all fours as her "boyfriend" gyrated over her from the back. Again. The only thing missing here was the pole. Let me tell you, I was ready for a shower. On my way back, I had to break up a couple of bump and grinders getting busy on the other side of the juice machine. My stomach eyes are way too delicate for this debauchery.

But the highlight came towards the end of the evening when yours truly, a Hobbit in all my shortness and under-developed glory, broke up a fight. Between a boy and a girl. With hitting. Apparently the lesson is no longer we don't hit one another and especially boys don't hit girls. Apparently the new regime is you throw down a slap and you're a-gonna get slapped back. But don't worry...it's my understanding they were back to making out under the stairwell this morning, so I guess all is fair in love and war.

By the time the lights came up my head was spinning and I was seriously considering home-schooling my daughters until college.That said, I must give a shout-out to my friends whose sons and daughters were there (you know who you are) because their children behaved like the young ladies and gentlemen I know their parents have raised them to be. Sadly, our children were in the minority Friday evening. And no, I'm not just saying this because they are my friends, but I don't tend to surround myself with anything but the best, so there it is. 

But to the rest of the parents? You're not here to be your child's friend. I suggest you teach your sons how to treat young ladies and teach your daughters how to behave like one.


  1. Wow! Hitting??? Between a boy & a girl??? That's horrible!

    I'm actually, sadly, not very surprised about the dress & the dancing. I've seen a lot myself that's none too pleasing to look at. I went to a Lady Gaga concert last summer and I'm by no means a prude. In fact, I consider myself far from one. But I was so shocked at how a majority of young girls were dressed. They were probably around 12, 13 tops. I mean I wasn't surprised with the other things I saw at the concert. The dressing up and expressing yourself thing. That's totally cool and great. But these girls were just being blatantly sexed up just for the sake of being so. Not self expression. They were more like clones of sleaze. It was really sad and stayed with me for days. You just brought me right back. Oh and I'm actually going to another Lady Gaga concert next week so lets see how this one goes :)

  2. Oh. My. God. And yes, it is so freaking scary! I was dancing at home with the 13-yr-old and she had some moves, well, they FREAKED me OUT! On the plus side, things are rather conservative here in France and (I think) things don't move as fast as they do in the US. At least that's what I tell myself.

  3. Oh my word - my neices are 18 and 22 and they STILL don't dress or act like that.
    What happened to the good old days of the girls cowering against one wall waiting for a boy to ask them to dance and the boys holding up the other wall trying to work up the courage to walk across the gym? When everybody was sweaty from nerves instead of hot bump & grind action...
    Now THAT was a school dance!

  4. Well, Beth, I am both nauseated and repulsed by the visions in my head. Yes, I guess home-schooling is an option (but a whopper of one). Or...take them out of that environment. Provide an alternative event, chaperoned by you and/or the other parents you trust, instead of allowing them to attend another dance. You can provide just as much fun: dinner and a play; small social soiree (don't call it that to them--they won't get it) a chez vous--with dancing too if you want (but you get to pick the kids and the music); do a scavenger hunt; take them en masse to a local open mic event; etc. There are so many other options--and they all give you parental control. Just thoughts...xxBliss

  5. Great ideas, Bliss! In fact, now that warm weather is approaching my girls are already planning things they can do with their friends. Luckily, the majority of this went unnoticed by them (they were off with their "girls") but it was enough to make me reel!

    And I'm with fojoy, remembering the electricity of nervous energy and that feeling when you were asked to dance. AND - it was not anywhere close to bump and grind; it was straight arms, barely touching one another slowly going around in a circle :o) Those were the days...

    I am not easily shocked...believe me...and I have never considered myself a prude, but if this is the norm we are in serious trouble as a society.

  6. That sounds horrid. And disgusting. It's no wonder Abercrombie and Fitch are selling push-up bikinis to 8 year olds because parents buy it. And parents allow this type of conduct because they are either too lazy to correct it or they just don't think it's a big deal.

    My stepdaughter is so elegant and refined at 16. She avoids dances at her high school because of that very behavior. We are so lucky she turned out the way she did.


Please share your thoughts, ideas, hopes, and dreams...I love reading every one of them!